I have been trying to see Jesus in everything. I believe He is in all things, well most things....okay some things maybe not. He is in the tears in the morning, in the prayers for my family, in the hope for our future. Family is the basis for everything(Father, Son and the Holy Ghost). God made families. We replicate it in our churches. We try to create that sense of family, that sense of community. I see Jesus there, in my family and in our community. I am honestly trying to see Jesus everywhere. Maybe I am wrong about that....
I long for an encounter with Him, for answers from Him, for a vision of Him. I hunger for the hope that only He can give. I try to keep the balance of that longing with the reality of a life that pushes and pulls on me from every direction. I have responsibilities, none more important than my family. To love them, to cherish them, to honor them is to show them Jesus. I fail them on a regular basis. Fear overwhelms me, grief dulls my mind, circumstances are maginified. I show them me instead of Jesus. I give them a cheap imitation because I have failed to fill my cup with the living water. To remember that He is what I need. To remember that He is what they need.
He is always there, looking out from the tabernacle of my heart and looking back at me from others. My heart cries out for their needs, their pain as much as it cries for my own. I am not devoid of pain but rather my heart is large enough to feel theirs as well as my own and still I fail.
Jesus longs to meet every need and that is good because when I try to meet every need it always leads to failure. Big time failure, because I can't be what everyone needs only God can do that.
Everyone craves the hope that only He can give, they just don't know it(sometimes I don't know it, that peppermint patty only offers temporary happiness then I want another one). Sometimes, I am filling that craving in my soul with temporary, imitations of grace and love. Looking for others to be my answer. They are lovely and grace filled but....only God can truly meet my craving.
Family and community places us in the middle of a mission field not to "fill a craving", but to point to the one who satisfies. To pass them the cup that never runs dry. Living water. The only hope I have is rooted in Jesus Christ our soon coming King. I have nothing to offer other than that.
I have to hunger and thirst for righteousness time and time again....my craving for Jesus never goes away. However, I can find myself filling it with other things. Dulling it with the things of this world. Things that I cannot see Jesus in at all.
Maybe I have it all wrong, in this looking for Jesus in everything.
Maybe it is more about letting Jesus be my everything, then maybe He will be in my everything. I am thirsty, this much is true. I do know the answer to the craving, and He lives inside me. So today, I am going to look inside for Jesus instead of looking everywhere else. He is here. The King is here, in me and therefore in my family and in my community of love and faith. No more straining to see, today I will just drink of His love and mercy and take Him everywhere I go.