Here is the answer, I have been looking for...

13 All these people died still believing what God had promised them. They did not receive what was promised, but they saw it all from a distance and welcomed it. They agreed that they were foreigners and nomads here on earth.14 Obviously people who say such things are looking forward to a country they can call their own.15 If they had longed for the country they came from, they could have gone back.16 But they were looking for a better place, a heavenly homeland. That is why God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

Heb 11:13-16 (NLT)

This verse just wrecked me....split my brain open....tore my heart out and poured the love of God over all my insides.  I know it is weird verbage but it is how I feel, like my insides are vulnerable and accessible and this verse has just met those parts...brain and heart and brought hope and revelation.

I know this verse...read it many, many times.  But these words just jumped out at me, "They did not receive what was promised, but they saw it all from a distance and welcomed it."  Sometimes you don't get what is promised here on this earth.  

All my questions and wrestling is answered in this simple verse.  Sometimes you don't get it here.

All those horrible thoughts:  It's not my fault, its not because I didn't have enough faith, I didn't deserve it, it wasn't punishment, etc.  You can insert all your stinking thinking in here as well....you too can be set free with this truth.  

All these thoughts, all these doubts, all the regrets can be left at the foot of the cross.  Great men and women of God have not received what God has promised.....yet.

I am not alone, shunned by God, somehow chosen to not receive....I am in good company, with all the other misfit foreigners who don't belong here, who didn't get their answer here....I know a few...

Here, here in this verse.....My question of why couldn't my son be healed when we prayed, is answered....

I see the promise in the distance....a heavenly homeland....a healed and whole son...a city prepared for us.

This disappointment turned to appointment...divine appointment.

I can learn to welcome this.  I will not go back.  I am looking towards my heavenly homeland.

We all will face disappointment, prayers unanswered.  It may shake you, that's okay.  It happens to all of us.

However, maybe just maybe you will remember this verse and it will bring you comfort and the love of God will pour into your heart and you will know that sometimes the promise isn't delivered here...it's waiting there. 

Because, there is a heavenly homeland where every promise is delivered.

Hang on friends, we are going to get there...together.

Much love to my misfit foreigner friends!

Debbie